Thoughts and Stuff

A year ago today, I had just found out that I was going to be serving in the United Kingdom this year, I had just officially met almost everyone in the YAGM United Kingdom group, and I was standing by a pond discussing The Chronicles of Narnia with Grace, who I had just met. It was our first conversation ever, and it was actually before either of us knew that we were both going to be living in Manchester this year. We then left the pond, got taken to whichever airport we were flying out of, I got on a plane back to Montana and started the process of trying to figure out what this year was going to mean for me, personally.

I'm not really sure when I decided that I was going to learn how to be more vulnerable this year, but that has been happening. Tomorrow marks eight months since I arrived here, and it's been great. I've made friends, and learned new things, and I've been opening up, mostly with my YAGM United Kingdom cohort, about things like depression and things. Homesickness has never really been an issue for me. I mean, sure, I miss the people and places that I am familiar with, but I know that I am going to see them again, and return to them eventually, so it's not a big issue. However, most of you know that my Mom has been recently diagnosed with cancer, so I am feeling kind of torn at the moment. I know that it's not practical to feel guilty, I know that she has a good support system at home and I know that I will be back home in three months from today, on July 23rd, but it is hard being so far away from home right now. But I have faith that everything is going to turn out okay. 

Vulnerability is an interesting experience. It's scary, and I still am not very good at it, in situations where I am supposed to share my feelings I am usually one of the last ones, if not THE last one to do so, but I also have less secrets, which is freeing. Going home is going to be interesting. I am the same in a lot of ways, but I am also different in a lot of ways, so we'll see how that plays out. A year ago today I could not even begin to imagine what my life here was going to look like, and here I am with three months left. So if you need be, I'll be over here in Manchester, keeping things interesting :)